And what happened was Mort busted his mouth trying to take a can of sardines to the face. Not pretty, lemme tellya. We got him bandaged up real nice, though, sticking just to soft foods for the time being: Jell-O, tapioca, mac 'n' cheese, you know, whatever gets soggy if it sits there.

Triangular Jim was around that day, I recall, all buff and still glistening with his hair greased back, Brylcreemed. He kept saying, Can you believe it? Can you believe it? Back up off, Triangular Jim, we told him. Back up off, give our man Mort some space, let him have his air. Triangular Jim has had his ears obscured by wax for as long as any of us have known him. He's beyond built, yeah, the guy's practically German-engineered, but way, way obtuse.He said: There was a time on a highway, in a wide coupe long since sold and junked, when one of us predicted this would happen. Once Mort's eating solids again we'll argue, I'm sure, about who it was, and on which stretch of road.